XX.IX: Sheesh! Stone, That Was Close!

The #42 Minutes

While out with another potential "distraction," a woman confronts Peter Stone (who has been granted Most Favored Character status) and accuses him of rape. Steadfast in his claims of innocence, Stone instructs Benson and SVU to investigate. It's looking bad for Stone until Benson figures out it haaaad to be the Met not the Cub who raped Sarah while she was falling down drunk because...Peter wouldn't do that? While the pieces are falling into place, Gary takes Stone hostage but the HNT duo of Sarah and Emma Kent save the day and Stone disarms Gary off-screen. The Lieutenant pretends to be a good 'ole boy and gets Reggie (the Met) to essentially admit he did it then she goes to meet Stone who is gazing soulfully at New Jersey and probably wondering what else from his drunken MLB days he doesn't remember.

CARMEN!

In other news, Rollins may or may not move in with Al and Carisi's jealous. Riveting.

Verdict

List of things wrong with this episode:

1. What is it with people conveniently bumping into Stone? An admirer at the hot dog cart, Sarah Kent (the victim and Bushwick wife and mom who shows up at one of Stone's favorite haunts), and Gary Kent at the pub...

2. The shadow case Stone was prosecuting in the first part of the episode being used to emphasize his guilt and uncertainty...as if we needed more of that.

3. Doesn't Stone have an apartment? Why go to Fin's place?

4. Why is the entire squad all Peter's our friend we love him he couldn't have done this blah blah blah...I seem to remember a series-long MO of the squad typically being skeptical of new/outsider ADAs

5. Fin flashes his Sergeant's shield but says "Detective."

6. Why does Stone act all pissy about getting arrested? Certainly, given his job AND THE CASE HE WAS CURRENTLY WORKING, he knew this was a possibility if not a probability.

7. Sarah and Emma take the lead in hostage negotiation when Gary never asked for his wife or daughter but then again Benson Knows Best (insert eye roll) and Peter has a way with desperate, my-world-is-falling-apart men because he acts like he is one.

8. Also, Fin didn't help himself to any "treats"...I thought that was a thing now?

It's Family Day at HNT!

#CecilBHargitay had those cameras all up IN people's faces, did she not? Fine with me for everyone except you, Stone. Mariska can direct, write, edit, produce, costume, makeup, sound, and promote every episode but if they continue to feature Stone...I can't...

Quotable

"Way things are we're all looking at our pasts through a new prism." Fin and Carisi struggling with the accusation could have held some weight and been interesting if they clothed their skepticism in their own personal experiences rather than an almost sycophantic loyalty to Stone. 

"What is that I was happy." LOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOL. Best line of the night and it doesn't even matter.

"I'm gonna get ya a ginger ale. That steak's gonna give you indigestion." Poor Carisi. He's right about Al. He's also the only one who gives a damn about this stupid subplot. 

"If you want someone to make this go away you came to the wrong person." Stone pressuring Benson to make it go away would have been more intriguing than a melodramatic whiny plea for an impartial investigation. 

"I'm really getting sick of men who are not Tucker showing up at my door."

Is It Next Thursday, Yet?

There's more color in Benson's world. Could that be a symbol of something? Midlife crisis? Recommended by a book written by a child psychologist suggesting the palette will soothe stubborn children?

I'm bummed. This season keeps getting worse. I don't know what it is...flimsy plots, OOC writing, lack of continuity from ep to ep and seasons past, emphasis on people who are not Olivia Benson...

When Gary had the gun pointed at Stone, I yelled "SHOOT HIM!" 

I shouldn't be like that...

List of current SVU characters for whom I'm thankful from most to least:

1. Olivia Benson

2. Ed Tucker

3. Fin Tutuola

4. Sonny Carisi

5. Carmen

6. Officer Montero

7. Noah Benson

8. Jesse Rollins

9. Frannie Rollins

10. Amanda Rollins

Have a great holiday, y'all!

XX.VIII: Hell is a plate full of Stone

The #42Minutes

The episode opens at Far Rockaway by Andrew--an upscale seafood restaurant--where intense Chef Leibowitz (he has the restaurant's logo tatted on his hand!) barks out orders and he and right-hand-woman Kayla serve fancy entrees to a pair of overly-jolly journalists. For a split second the audience is led to believe it might be these two men who assault Kayla who is later taken to SVU after an altercation with a not-guilty Uber driver. SVU investigates, but they don't get much other than a consensual wine-cellar sex claim by Andrew and a sip of Montrachet for Fin as a disapproving Carisi looks on. They dig a little deeper and find three accusations against Andrew from Brooklyn and also discover his pattern of keeping panties as trophies. Nevertheless, the problem is they're in Brooklyn and their Peter Stone alleges he couldn't prosecute because the cases had too many weak links and holes and Kayla doesn't want to move forward with the charges because she's raking in six figures. But the good news is...Stone's sister was killed so he gets Kayla to testify and Benson is willing to leak the story to a tabloid to get more victims to come forward, only, the newest accuser, Bethany, points the finger at the seemingly squeaky-clean Chris Hodges rather than Andrew. In an interview lifted almost entirely from the Kavanaugh hearings, she recounts to Benson an assault which occurred in high school with crystal clear detail. When confronted with this info, Hodges gets all pissy and blames Andrew, agrees to wear a wire and participate in a sting, and SVU gets a twofer because the convo gives them enough evidence to arrest both men.

Yeah, the juice sorta looks like the brown stuff Ed drank, right buddy? I'm sad, too.

Also, Noah doesn't like olives.

Verdict

No joke, the only ONLY reason I continue to watch is Mariska Hargitay (did she request some time off or something because the star wasn't exactly featured and I could be wrong but the show sorta lives and dies with her). The "ripped from the headlines" plots feel lazy, the dialogue cheap and corny, and I am so, so, so, so weary of Peter Stone's anguished, pensive face on the fucking screen. Nothing against Philip Winchester, but I also can't stand his clipped, forlorn way he delivers his lines. You don't need to sell Stone's sadness anymore, dude. We get it.

The episode wasn't all that suspenseful, and I must have been the only one not shocked that the #MeToo advocate Hodges ended up being a bad guy, too. It was a convenient way for the writers to neatly denounce rapist chefs and rapist office seekers in only one #42Minute block and also hitch it to next week's Mea Culpa (more about that at the end of the post).

One thing I thought odd about the investigation (or maybe it was the editing) was that after Kayla walked out of SVU providing no leads other than it wasn't the Uber driver, the squad immediately went to the restaurant merely based on the driver's records. Without a willing, complaining victim, would that actually have happened?

When Benson and Stone finally agree they really, really need Kayla to cooperate (duh), Stone, not Benson, goes to see her. WHYYYYYYYYYY? He's not a fucking cop. He's a young-ish, successful, powerful white male with a few months of SVU prosecuting experience and he's the one tasked with convincing Kayla...AND the writers went there and clumsily wove sister Stone's murder into a reason why Kayla should fight back (and she flipped a little too quickly, btw). Give me a fucking break. The sympathy cow has been milked dry.

"But why?" Oh, shut up, Rollins. These writers write like it's freaking Groundhog Day.

Liv's new funky apartment paint job is cute...

I know many fans have been anti-Noah storylines for a long time. Until Sheila, I liked them. However, where are we going with stubborn Noah? Who cares? All kids are brats. Do any kids like salad? Is he acting out because his mother is never there (yawn)....enough already.

Annnnnd of course we must squeeze in a little female bonding scene about yet another ugly moment from Rollins' past....

Benson leaking the deets to the reporter in the dark stairwell was hot...I hope that doesn't come back to bite her but surely she has a fistful of "the ends justify the means" cards to play by now.

I did have to chuckle, though, at the osso buco...thanks, Kayla, another dish Noah can taste and spit out.

Quotable:

This week in "we're trying to be crude and authentic" lines that are actually so obnoxious they're laughable:
"banged her against the Bordeaux"
"three berry shortcake that'll give you both wood"

"Want half of my cinnamon raisin bagel?" Who says the whole name of the bagel? Also, I didn't believe for a second Rollins was bothered by Fin's barb...her retort was spot on "What's my type, Fin? Broke?" Rollins can take it and dish it. 

"NOT ANYMORE!"

Is It Next Thursday, Yet?

Okay, the pot brownie was funny, but, for the second time in a month, Fin crosses a line and takes a sip of Montrachet while in the wine cellar. Fin clearly gives no fucks and maybe feels invincible with that Sergeant's badge and whatever dirt he has on Dodds, but will he go too far at some point and end up with his career in jeopardy?

I'll gladly eat my blog a week from now, but I don't see how this whole Peter Stone sexual assault case ends well. Scenario 1: the accuser is lying. Scenario 2: the accuser may or may not be telling the truth but alcohol was involved and details are fuzzy and Stone gets a pass though, moving forward, he is continually under suspicion and Benson doesn't trust him.

Stone's probably going to get to interrogate his accuser on the stand and how will Benson react considering she knows what that's like and we know a) representing yourself is a boneheaded decision and b) Stone's not leaving so maybe our best hope is a suspension (served for a long time, off screen)

Me when thinking about post-S17 SVU

VII: A Psych Defense Without the Psych Defense

#42Minutes

After mortally wounded Charlie Mill is found by a neighbor, the squad is called to investigate a gruesome crime scene. Two more bodies. Coffee brewing. Cereal bowls out. No evidence of forced entry. The detectives zero in on the Mill's nanny who, admittedly, looks very guilty...bloody clothes and hiding in your brother's closet will do that for ya. The nanny gets a pass, though, because something weird is up with the Mill's financials. Eventually they uncover a scam perpetrated by Mrs. Mill; she's embezzled millions of dollars and her law firm is on to the racket. To "save" her family from the inevitable financial ruin and the consequences of her eventual incarceration, Anne Mill murdered her family and capped the whole thing off with her own suicide after a jury convicted her of one charge.

Verdict

Was the "20 years" of experience Benson claimed a nod to the 20th season? Because, um, her math is off.

And...this was an SVU case because? Not all crimes involving children automatically default to SVU. Wouldn't it go to Homicide?

I was convinced the writers were going to mimic the UWS killer nanny case from 2012--a tragedy that still makes me sick to my stomach, so the nanny in "Caretaker" functioned as a plausible red herring. As soon as the squad caught on to Anne's illegal financial schemes, the plot should have shifted to a shrink-centered case. This was the perfect time to introduce and develop Dr. Abernathy, but the writers gave her a minute or so of screen time, she quickly diagnosed Anne, and then Benson got to play shrink on the stand in the courtroom. I'm all for Benson getting the majority of the screen time, but this choice didn't make much sense, considering the defense's strategy.

Representation!

And hey, no Stone sister connection in this one but, instead of Delaney Williams as Buchanan, O'Boyle shows up to remind us Stone used to work in Chicago. Can you take him back to the Windy City with, ya, dude?

Finally, if we concede Benson has shrugged off most of her former reservations about Rollins, can we stop with the constant single mom angst? We get it. And please stop using the plot to ram their burgeoning BFFness down our throats (even though I'm sure the Rollivia faction went gaga over that hug).

Also--Carisi doesn't know the legacy of the White Horse? I have a hard time believing that...

Quotable

Carisi and Benson ponder Fin's assertion, "wouldn't be the first homewreckin' nanny on the Upper West Side."

Speaking of Fin...here's the rest of this week's FinSass:

"Musta been a helluva poem."

"She's in Rikers, I don't think they're gonna give her the key."

"Look who you're talking to, dude."

"Jesus I can't believe this."

"Mother's don't kill their babies."

WHAT? That scene in the middle of the episode (see pic below) was reminiscent of a cheesy whodunit. Why is anyone in this squad shocked? This is not their first instance of filicide.

This week in OOC OMB dialogue:

"Sometimes life just sucks."

"You should keep those flowers --sometimes we just need a little pretty."

Shouldn't SVU writers be required to watch a few of the past episodes? I mean, there are plenty from which to choose.

Fucking flowers again...

Is it Next Thursday Yet?

The holidays are upon us and OMB needs to reconsider her shopping list...other than that I don't know what I'm looking forward to or not looking forward to. Right now the show feels rudderless and the only consistent threads are elements I care nothing about (Rollins baby drama and Stone).

Adios!